My Mom

Though I am sure many would argue with me, I believe I have the best mom... in the history of ever ;).  I've always felt very blessed to have my mom as my mother.  I have always recognized in her the aspects that make a mom -- a mom.  Patience.  Love.  Unbelievable, unconditional love.  Gentleness.  Kindness.  A sense of humor. Patience.  Love.  Laughter.  Understanding.  Nurturing.  Maternal.  Selflessness.  Patience.  Love.  The ability to embarrass me, whether I'm 16 or 29...

And now that I am a mother, I realize even more fully how blessed I am to have my mother be mine.  

Before I became a mother, my hope was that I might become half the mother my mom is.  I can't say I think I've been successful, but hopefully I'm a work in progress.  And I'm so very grateful to have her as my example.

And here's why:

My mom has the best sense of humor.  She can laugh at herself, and I love that about her.  Some of the greatest examples of this:  Back in 2009, she, my dad, and I were driving from Alabama to Washington, bringing Christina's Jeep out.  My dad was never willing to navigate (he doesn't feel like he is good at it), so he was either driving or in the back chatting.  At this particular point, he was in the back and I was navigating -- my mom was driving.  We were cruising through California and my dad was musing aloud whether or not we thought those orchards of trees we were passing were fig trees.  My mom (who hadn't heard him properly) said (under her breath), "I'm pretty sure those trees are real."  I had heard both things properly (and I was a little out-done with this roadtrip) and I reiterated: "fig trees."  To which she responded, "Yeah, I think they are real trees."  And I exclaimed: "FIG!  He said FIG!"  Oh my goodness.  I still laugh so hard about that one.  I mean, really?  She thought he was proposing there was an orchard full of fake trees!?!  She just about drove off the road laughing after she realized what he'd really said.  And she still laughs about it too.  Or there was this time when she was contemplating changing her ring tone on her cell phone.  And she was going through each option.  And had gone full circle and heard her phone ringing.  An incoming call!  Quite flustered, she quickly tried to push the button to answer it and said, "hello?  Hello?"  Yeah, it was just the little sample of the ring tone -- that just happened to be the one she had it set on.  That was classic.  I love that she laughs at these.  It's a great example to me not to take myself too seriously in life.

I remember growing up, and for our birthday, she would come in and sing to us in the morning.  Happy Birthday.  That's how she'd wake us up on our birthday.  And as much as I loathed mornings, I just couldn't be grumpy on those mornings.  I remember when I turned 16, she stayed up late the night before with me and made a whole bunch of cupcakes for me to take to seminary and my Spanish class.

I remember in the summers, when we'd do our Bake Sale, my mom was always did the baking -- and supplied the ingredients!  She did that so we could have 100% profit.  I realized how kind that was when, in 1997, she came up to the States a little before us and my dad was in charge of taking us to the store to buy ingredients.  He was all business.  And the business (bake sale profits) paid for the ingredients that time.  Haha...  Sure made me appreciate my mom more for that! ;).

I love my mom's wisdom.  A few years back, I was bemoaning my being "old."  Haha.  Mostly I was just feeling old and wondering if I'd ever get married.  My mother, in all her awesome wisdom, gave me this gem: "The way I see it, anyone born the same year as me is either my same age or dead."  It's so true.  But for some reason, I find it so incredibly hilarious.

My mom is incredibly patient in ways I cannot comprehend.  She never rises to an argument.  She sees good in everyone.  And always taught me growing up that there is good in everyone.  And I guess she once told the assistant director at the library where we both once worked (in Dothan) that are no bad children, only bad choices.  And that really stuck with him as he started raising his daughter.

My mom is a great cook.  She makes bomb macaroni and cheese.  And arroz con pollo.  And empanaditas.  And flan.  And chicken.  And stuffing.  And gravy.  And mashed potatoes.  And pretty much any other comfort food you can imagine.  And let's not forget the brownies, cookies, yadda yadda yadda.  She frequently takes a full meal to the funeral home where she works to feed all the employees.  And they all are happy when she does.

Righteousness and faithfulness.  My mom never complains.  She just keeps moving forward, no matter what sort of lemons life hands her.  This is another area where I stand in awe and feel I have much to learn from her.

Let's not forget the embarrassment...  So one time, when we were flying back to Panama, she embarrassed me by telling me (loudly, I might add) that the male flight attendant (who was quite cute, I will admit) was checking me out.  And while a part of me was flattered...  A part of me was mortified she noticed and said something about it.

And love.  My mom loves me.  And all of her children.  I sometimes get a little scared at the prospect of having more children, because it is incredible to me that I could love another baby as much as I love my baby girl.  But then I realize:  I'm not the first of my mom's children.  I am her second baby.  And I have never ever ever not even once doubted her love for me.  I've never felt like she loved my older brother more than she loved me.  And this gives me confidence that it will be the same for me when I have more babies.  That my love will grow.

As usual, I feel I have not done this justice.  I just know I love my mom.  I love the example she has set for me.  I have felt her love throughout my life.  I am very very blessed.  The truth is, I don't really have the words.  I just know the way I feel.  And grateful is definitely among those feelings.

And here is a poem I wrote about her back in 2005 in my Creative Writing class.  The changed perspective as one matures and realizes what a mother really is.  Who she is.

A Different View
A lifetime ago she annoyed me:
A sing-song voice singing,
“It’s time to get up in the morning!”
A drill sergeant:
“Hila, your dish-night.”
A nag:
“Go clean your room; no MTV.”
A lifetime since she’s become my adviser,
My pillow for crying, my cooking instructor.
A lifetime ago, I was wrong.

What are you grateful for today?