My Can Rotater!!

THIS is my Christmas present from my sweetie!  He knew I'd been wanting to get something to store our cans for two reasons:

1.  So I can free up room in my very small kitchen
2.  So I can stock up on our canned food storage
3.  So I can have more organization and make sure I'm using the oldest stuff first

Okay, turns out there were actually three reasons ;)...

My sweetie loves to create and build and make.  It's probably the engineer in him.  And so he designed this can holder and built it.  For Christmas, I got the plans.  For New Year's, he built it ;).

And I LOVE it.  I am so excited that I now have a place to store all our canned goods.  And that means I can now start building our storage of them!!!  More than what I had before :).

And this definitely makes my grateful list today...  Because it is totally rockin' the Nilla Life!

What are you grateful for today?

My (Generally) Able Body

I will admit that my body's ability to do so much is one of those things I often take for granted. 

And then, out of the clear blue while not doing anything but bending over and standing up, my lower back tweaks and a strange sensation shoots down my right leg, and suddenly I'm realizing all my body does for me -- and how ultra-lame it is when something stops working awesomely.  (In this case, it's my lower back).

True, there are -- and have always been (and probably always will be) -- things I am not thrilled with about my body.  Mostly appearance things.

But my body (generally) functions as it should.  My body was even able to carry a baby -- something I worried would be an impossibility once upon a time.  I have ten fingers and ten toes; two hands and two feet.  How often do I realize what a great blessing it is to have all these working appendages?  Not often, I confess. 

I can remember being in elementary school, and one of my teachers showed us a video of a woman who was born without arms and hands.  She learned how to do so many things with her feet.  It was truly amazing.  If I'm honest with myself, I don't think I would have been as strong as that woman who excelled in spite of her body's limitations.  Half the time, when I've encountered my own body's flaws or limitations, I have been more of a whiner and a "why-me"-er.  Definitely need to work on that!

But, though my body is definitely imperfect in its own ways, it's certainly a very able body.  And I am grateful for that.  I am grateful I can walk and run (slowly... I'm definitely not a runner!).  I'm grateful I can hug and snuggle my baby -- and even change her diapers ;).  I'm grateful I can jump and drive a car and bend and carry and lift.  And do so many other things my body enables me to do without even thinking about it. 

My body isn't perfect, but it's mine.  It houses my spirit and allows me to experience so much of the wonderfulness of life so that I learn.  And I am grateful.  And I acknowledge that gratitude better on the days I am not up to snuff and my husband takes over baby duties so I can rest my back and heal.  (Mommies are in high demand, so it's never a good thing to be out of commission... even a little bit ;)!)

What are you grateful for today?

Puffs

That package I mentioned that contained the smile-making twinkies?  Yeah, it also had these!  (For baby girl, not me, in case you were wondering ;)). 

What was cool about this is that I was planning to buy some of these for her, but hadn't made it to the store since before Christmas, so it didn't happen.  And then...  There they were!  So awesome.  And sweet potato puffs too!  She loves sweet potatoes.

Anyway, I am grateful for these things, because they are a great stepping stone into helping our sweet girl learn how to eat things with more substance, but they are safer than starting her with Cheerios or crackers, because she's less likely to choke on them.  Because they disintegrate so quickly!  Love that about them.

I also love that they have the added bonus of being entertainment too!  (Possibly more for us as we watch her attempt to get them in her mouth...).  In all seriousness, though...  These were great for church today.  I'd put one in my hand and let her grab it out and spend 30 seconds to a minute trying to figure out how to eat it.  Then repeat.  Kept her quiet for a good long while! 

Plus, she's learning more fine-tuned motor skills.  Extra bonus there! 

So all around, these puffs are awesome.  And I'm totally getting more of them.  It's sort of bittersweet as it's just one more stage proving that my baby is growing up...  But it's a good thing.  And I'm grateful to have things like this available to me to help her as she grows, learns, and develops... and eats!

What are you grateful for today?

Twinkies

 

Want something that can put a smile on your face?  Arrive home to a package outside your door!! 

I got a belated Christmas package today from my awesome friend April.

Want something that can put an even bigger smile on your face?  Open the box and find...  twinkies.  (Among other awesome things... but this is all about twinkies ;)).

About a year ago, when the announcement came out that there would be no more twinkies...  Well, my heart broke a little bit.  What kind of a world doesn't have twinkies!?!  No world I want to live in!  Haha... 

Okay, a little dramatic.  But I was saddened by the news.  Twinkies are just a staple.  They should always exist.  My husband and I tried to find some at a grocery store after the announcement, but of course all were sold out by then. 

Thankfully, some other company decided to buy out Hostess.  I can still remember seeing twinkies back on the shelf for the first time in a year.  And I totally snagged a box that day.

The box of twinkies now says "The sweetest comeback in the history of ever."  And yeah, that about sums it up. 

I'm grateful for twinkies.  They make me happy :).

Plus, it doesn't hurt that my siblings and I share a funny memory about strawberry twinkies (don't think they make those anymore, but oh about...  20 or so years ago they did...) and waking up my brother's friend Kristian during a sleepover birthday party so he could eat one -- and he started crying because he wanted to sleep.  Apparently we thought the twinkies were that important that we woke up that poor kid.

What are you grateful for today?

Our Van

About a year and a half ago, my Buick Skylark bit the dust.  To tell the truth, I am grateful for that old clunker and the role it played in my life for almost 10 years...  I certainly have stories that make me laugh (and my friends too) like having to pull up my pant legs due to the puddle that always pooled on the driver's floorboard...  Or the time I taped the driver's sideview mirror together...  Or having to "tuck it in" at night during the winter so the locks wouldn't freeze (and prevent me from getting into my car the next day)...  Oh the memories... 

But that car did eventually bite the dust, and we didn't feel it was worth the money to repair it.  So we sold it to a junk yard, and moved on with life.

And the purchase of another vehicle.

We decided on a van for two reasons:  1.  Because we hoped to have a family.  2.  Because we figured even if we didn't (and/or until we did), we could haul around a lot of people anyway... plus we could take out seats and haul a lot of stuff.

And boy did we ever! 

We did some research and decided we wanted either a Dodge Grand Caravan, a Toyota Sienna, or a Honda Odyssey.  We had our price range.  And we started our search.  It took us a while, but one magical day, there was a posting on Craigslist.  Our van.  A 2001 Honda Odyssey meeting pretty much all our requirements. 

True, the girl from whom we bought it was a little flaky (she didn't realize we would show up prepared to pay for the van and drive it away that day... so we made a good-faith agreement that we would buy the van after she was done with it later that week -- so long as no damage occurred between those days). 

But we had found our vehicle.  An answer to prayers. 

And it has been a wonderful vehicle for us.  We have moved all of our belongings with it (including a mattress and couch and curio cabinet) -- though I don't think we could at this point...  We have loaded several kids in it.  We have traveled in it to visit family.  My husband just recently used it to haul all the wood he bought to make my can rotation thing (my Christmas gift). 

We feel blessed to have this vehicle.  It does a lot for us and hasn't given us any issues (well, maybe the automatic doors are a bit annoying, since one of them has already broken, but I guess that's what happens with convenience ;))... 

And I'm grateful for the freedom it affords me to go where I want pretty much whenever I want :).

What are you grateful for today?

My Cheese Grater

We buy the big Costco block of cheese.  Presumably because it's cheaper to just shred it than to buy it shredded.  I haven't actually crunched the numbers (and maybe I should...). 

For some reason, one of my least favorite things in the cooking department (second only to cutting onions) is shredding cheese.  I know, I know... Lazy.  I think it's partially (or mostly) because I don't enjoy washing that thing.  

So as I was shredding cheese in preparation for some home-made cheesy potato soup, I was being complainy (mentally) and thinking about how I hate shredding cheese (I'm a bit of a drama queen sometimes ;)). 

And then I thought about how great it is that I actually have a cheese grater.  I mean, how the heck would I have shredded cheese otherwise -- besides buying it?  Or how did they have it back in the day?  Maybe they didn't.  And so, rather than whining about how I would have to clean this boxy thing later (because that's what I usually complain about ;))... I decided to be grateful for this wonderful tool that allows me to have shredded cheese quite quickly and quite easily. 

And maybe I'll stop complaining about something so silly in the future and just be grateful!

What are you grateful for today?

Our Savior's Birth

Last Christmas, before I quit working, I received a Christmas card from a co-worker.  On the front of the card was a simple, but beautiful, picture of Mary, holding a tiny infant in her arms -- the Christ child.  No words were written.  But on the inside, in a single poignant sentence, the message of Christmas was shared, and it touched my heart.  So much so that I decided to keep that card for every year.

"In her arms she held the hope of the world."

Never has a card touched me so profoundly.  Perhaps it was that I was on the verge of motherhood myself.  Or perhaps it was the simplicity and beauty of the card.  The truth held within.

In ten small words, the meaning of Christmas was shared.  For with His birth, hope was born.

So, on this day set aside to celebrate and remember our Savior's birth, I give thanks that He came.  And that He came for me.

Merry CHRISTmas.

What are you grateful for today?

Opportunities to Laugh at Myself!

I make a lot of mistakes.  A lot.  And the vast majority of them are way worse than the one pictured above. 

Because, contrary to what our Christmas cards may have said...  Our last name isn't Henderson...  And the message I would have included on our Christmas card definitely wasn't the one that actually was included (I mean, I think that's a pretty lame Christmas message...).

But that's what happens when you're human.  And I definitely am!  I got so focused on the pictures I wanted to include in our annual Christmas card that I forgot to edit the text that is automatically included in the sample cards by Wal-Mart.  Guess who won't ever make that mistake again...

The truth is, when I first realized my mistake (as I lay in bed feeling kind of sick and overly tired about 3 hours after I'd ordered them), I was horrified.  And on the verge of a panic attack.  Had I really just ordered our Christmas cards with the wrong last name!?!  Who does that!?!

After listening to me blowing out huge sighs of hot air (while I was trying to relax and decompress over this issue), my husband asked me what was on my mind.  So I told him.  And you know what he did?  He laughed. 

And I couldn't help but laugh too.  And the more we talked about it, the harder he laughed.  And the harder I laughed.  And the less stressed I was.  He finally asked what last name was on the card, and when I told him...  For some reason that was the best laugh ever.

And once I'd decided he was right:  that it wasn't that big a deal and I might as well embrace it and play it up...  Well, it just became one of my classic Nilla stories for the memory book.  And I had a couple friends tell me they hoped it would come in with the wrong last name -- and that I should put a different last name every year!  Haha...

So there you have it.  I'm human.  I make mistakes.  And when I do something like this...  Well, I might as well just laugh about it and be grateful that I can.  Because as someone once said:  "As long as you can laugh at yourself, you will never cease to be amused."

So, Merry Christmas from the Hendersons.  And from us too ;).

What are you grateful for today?

Christmas Cards

There's just something wonderful about Christmas cards...  For one thing, they aren't bills!  Haha...  Or junk mail ;).  It's nice to go to the mail box and feel excited that there may be something there that isn't one of those two items!  And with today's world of emails and texting and blogging and cell phones and facebook...  Well, it's generally easier to skip the snail mail route.  I know I usually do.  Except for at Christmas time.  And what a treat to get real -- exciting -- mail. 

I even get all excited about sending out Christmas cards :).  I love to get them ordered and write up the family letter (though it took me way longer than anticipated this year!) and send them out.  Even if they end up getting sent with a hideous (hilarious) mistake!

The last few years, I've started hanging up the cards we have received on a wall in the house.  It adds to our Christmas cheer.  And it makes me grateful even more for those cards that bring a smile, because we know they've been sent with love by those we love.

What are you grateful for today?

Teether Toys!

Teether toys definitely hit my grateful list today (and probably my husband's too).  Our fingers are spared many teeth dents :)...  Baby girl may be trying to get her top teeth (since she already has her two bottoms...), because she has been going to town with the chewing lately! 

And all I can say is... whoever came up with teethers was a genius!

What are you gratful for today?

These Christmas Cookies

...And all the others that were on the table, but not pictured.

Because these cookies represent the fun -- and chaotic -- day I had.  My brother came into town with his wife and two kids to pick up his other 3 kids for the week.  And they stayed at my house for the night.  Along with my other two nieces.  And we made Christmas cookies (the first time I've done it, at least as an adult -- thanks Ani for the recipe!!!) and decorated them. 

And yeah, it was crazy with 8 kids (including 2 babies) and 4 adults...  But it was something I was looking forward to for a few weeks.  And it has been wonderful to have them all here, even just for one night. 

What are you grateful for today?

Julie S (a.k.a. Juliebean)

Fifteen years ago today, I met Julie.  It was a Tuesday night.  Freakish memory?  Maybe.  But I remember, because it was my first day of work (or night, rather) in the children's room at the public library in Dothan.  I was working with my boss (who was -- and is -- awesome), so I know it was a Tuesday.  And I remember it was Julie's birthday, because she was there finishing up her shift and someone had given her some of those Ferrero Rochert candies and she offered me one. 

Fifteen years.  That's almost half my lifetime.  But what a beautiful friendship it's been.  Funny, considering she didn't think she'd like working with me -- because she thought I was quiet.  (I quickly rectified that fear for her!)

Somehow, Julie and I discovered that we were similar in many ways.  We shelved books the same way....  We both liked a particular Divinyls song (which she said she would never have owned up to had I not done so first...).  And somehow, we became friends.  Over an ill-fated trip to the grocery store for Little Debbie Snack cakes (which we never found, by the way -- that was the ill-fated part).  That event was the last day of February in 1999. 

Before long, Julie and I were two peas in a pod.  And we did almost everything together.  We made s'mores together (some more decorative than others...).  We got lost on the way to Valdosta together.  We saw multiple chick flicks together in the summer of 1999.  (And more recently have seen some crummy non-chick-flicks together...)  And over the years...  Well, we did even more together (like the time I "helped" her pee...).  Okay, so it was her wedding day and she needed two people -- me and her momma -- to hold her dress up for her.  We'd gab on the phone for hours (I kid you not) every. single. day.  Back when we were both working women.  I don't know how we had so much to talk about...  We rang in many a new year together.  We fondued together.  I put on clown make-up at her house once.  We know Batman came out in 1989, and that a 1 in 10 chance of winning is good enough odds for a pair of awesome 80s gals like us.  We took Brosie to the vet together -- and still laugh about him peeing in the back of her car on the way home.  We took pictures with the Blues Brothers together.  And gotten each other the exact same Christmas present (not on purpose).

We've Tuscaloosa'ed together, Birmingham'ed together (before she lived there -- back when we were introduced to the trailer hotel and dumb sockey players...),  Savannah'ed together...  And soon we will be Seattle-ing together (and I can't wait!!!).

And we set a goal to take a photo together (professionally) every 10 years.  Starting with 1999.  We did it in 2009.  Only 6 more years to go for the next one...

We've been each other's ear for trials and heartaches, tears and fears.  We've been each other's cheer-leader for awesome life events and hopes and dreams.  We've seen each other grow.  We've seen each other through new jobs and "no" jobs (well, unless you count stay-at-home mom as a job... and we DO!)

It's been an amazing 15 years.  So much fun.  So much laughter.  How grateful I am for a cherished friendship which has endured.  How grateful I am for Juliebean (her nickname... and mine is Nilla... hence the url for this blog...). 

Here's to the next 15!  Happy Birthday, Julie.  Thanks for being a huge bright spot who rocks the Nilla life ;).

What are you grateful for today?

Clean Water

I think sometimes, even when I am looking for the good things in every day, I easily overlook the little things...  That are really the bigger things.  Okay, I probably do that more than sometimes.

For some reason, last night, clean water popped into my head.  The truth is, I rarely acknowledge what a blessing it is to be able to go to my water faucet, turn it on, and have clean water pour out.

I can use it to bathe (and I do like my *warm* showers).  I can use it to cook.  I can use it to wash clothes.  I can drink it.  (Granted, we filter our water here, since my husband grew up on well-water and doesn't enjoy the chlorine taste of city water...  But we don't have to filter it for it to be safe.)

Fresh, pure, clean water is a thing I've always had.  And so I rarely consider what a blessing it truly is.  But last night it popped into my head.

Water is a necessity of life.  And it sometimes boggles my mind to realize not everyone is blessed to have it so plentifully -- or so easily and cleanly.

I'm also grateful that, as part of being prepared, we are counseled to have fresh water in the event of an emergency.  And I'm grateful that we have made that a priority, and that we've found a convenient way to rotate it.

Because, though I've never had to know what it's like for clean water to be a scarcity...  The truth is, it could happen.  Consider some of the recent natural disasters.

So, hopefully, as I sip my water multiple times a day, I'll start being more aware of what a blessing it is.  And remember to be grateful for those small things that really aren't so small.

What are you grateful for today? 

A Good Read

I love to read.  When I can find the time ;).

And no, that's not why I planned to become a librarian!  But it certainly didn't hurt.

I read for pleasure.  I don't so much enjoy reading for requirement (like for a research paper).  Most of what I read is fiction.  Because I like to escape into a good story.  I actually quite enjoy historical fiction, because in those cases, someone else has done the research, and I can learn something from my enjoyment reading.  Lazy?  Maybe.  But I call it having my cake and eating it too ;).

I do read some non-fiction.  In fact, that's something I decided to start incorporating into my never-ending "to read" list...  Non-fiction books.  Usually these are books I choose because I'm interested in the topic.  Like ship disasters (I don't know why this interests me, but it always has...) or World War II stuff.  This is where working in libraries was handy... I'd be shelving non-fiction and see a cover that piqued my interest (yes, I sometimes do judge a book by its cover) , so I'd read the blurb and decide to add it to my to-read list. 

But mostly it's fiction.  I try to read a variety -- from children's, Young Adult, and Adult levels.  And many different genres -- historical, classic literature, suspense (I particularly love medical thrillers like Tess Gerritsen's books).  And when I was working in public libraries, I decided it would behoove me to read at least one book by some of the major authors.  I learned I don't understand why Danielle Steele is so popular. 

I keep multiple lists of the books I've read (because I'm a neurotic list-lover).  And I have an account on goodreads.com.  It's perfect for the book-loving list-addict.

Excluding scriptures, I try to never read more than one book at a time.  This "rule" had to be ignored while I was in school, much to my extreme dismay.

I prefer books that have a happy ending.  Especially the fiction ones.  So I'm not so much a fan of the teen "problem novel" genre where sometimes the book just ends without resolution.  I read several of those for graduate school stuff, and I just never could really enjoy them.  But that's me.

So here are a few of my favorites, in no particular order (and I avoided listing some of the hugely popular ones, like Twilight, Harry Potter, and Hunger Games):

Daddy Long Legs -- Jean Webster.  A must-read for pre-teen, teen, and adult girls; at least as far as I'm concerned.  The main character is witty and hilarious and sarcastic. 

In Harm's Way -- Doug Stanton.  The story of the sinking of a battleship in WWII.  Written novel-like, so I thoroughly enjoyed it and learned stuff to boot!

Life As We Knew It -- Susan Beth Pfeffer.  A young adult book about what might happen in a world-wide catastrophic event.  Couldn't put it down.  Scared the bajeebies out of me.  Totally made me want to be prepared.  And read the other two in the series.

The Surgeon -- Tess Gerritsen.  Her first in the Rizzoli/Isles series (yes, it's now a tv show.  No, I've never watched it).  Intense books, but love them.

Al Capone Does My Shirts -- Gennifer Choldenko.  Another young adult (but young young adult).  So stinkin' cute! 

I'm always looking for books to add to my to-read list, so what are your favorites?

Anyway, I just love a good read.  Something with which I can relax.  Something for a little "me time."  And I'm grateful for so many options at my disposal (through the awesome public library, of course ;)).

What are you grateful for today?

Amalea H

When I moved to Washington in 2008, I was in a pretty huge transitional phase of my life.  Because I was single (albeit old), I was contemplating attending a Ward (church congregation) for young single adults.  My thinking was, if I was going to meet someone single in my faith... well, it would probably be there. 

But I sincerely believe I (we) have a loving Heavenly Father who will guide me (us) so I (we) am (are) where I (we) need to be when I (we) need to be.  Even if it takes a few years to pan out. 

Thus, the Sunday I was planning to make arrangements to attend that young single adult congregation is the exact Sunday I was asked to serve as a counselor in Relief Society to Amalea (which would keep me in the family ward -- which is a congregation with married people and children).  Feeling that this was not coincidental, I accepted the calling and met one of the most wonderful women ever. 

And consequently found a husband.  (After a few years...)

Amalea is awesome.  She is full of life and full of fun.  She is giving and thoughtful.  She is hilarious.  Few others can make me laugh the way she does -- usually from the shock.  For example, she would have ladies' night out parties and we would watch a chick flick.  One night we watched one of the Twilight movies.  And she declared that she found the actor who portrays Edward sexy.

Ummm.  Ew.  Haha.  Well, so we don't find the same attributes attractive in men. 

Although...  She is the one responsible for my husband being my husband.  And she did say he was cute when she was first telling me all about him :).  (And she was right!)  It's a long story, but I do believe it was one of those things orchestrated by my Heavenly Father.  And had I never accepted that call to serve with Amalea, it may be unlikely my husband and I would ever have met. 

But we did.  And because of that special fact, our little baby girl's middle name is Amalea.  So we can tell her one day about this woman who holds a special place in our hearts.  So we can tell her that she is named after someone fun and amazing and hilarious and wise.  So we can tell her how grateful we are for Amalea.

What are you grateful for today?

Me Time

I seriously had no idea just how much I would cherish "me time" until it became hard to come by.

Don't get me wrong:  I love my family.  I love my baby girl. 

I just also now realize how important it is to have time to yourself (myself). 

These days, for me, that means after baby girl goes down for the night.  It's when I'm able to tie up all the loose ends that managed to unravel during the day (like folding the laundry that got washed, but not folded; working on Christmas baking), but it's also when I feel like I can sit on the couch for a few minutes and relax (read a book, surf the internet). 

Sometimes it's the time that keeps me sane :).  And I'm definitely grateful for that!

What are you grateful for today?

Texting

Sometimes I ponder the fact that I am living in a time when the dictionary is gaining a lot of new words.  Like texting.  Or googling.  Or twitter. 

And sometimes, I find myself doing things I swore I'd never do.  Like texting.

I'm not joking.  I am notorious for saying I will never do something... and then doing it at some point later on.  So I'm learning not to say never so much.  I'm not such a fan of eating crow...

Anyway, so yeah.  Now I'm an avid texter.  Sometimes I think I'm a little bit too reliant on it.  I often prefer it to actual conversations -- and maybe that's not the best.  But...  There is just something convenient about it.  And I don't have to worry about interrupting someone with a phone call.  And there's no logging into voicemail to check a message... 

I love that, with a few button pushes, I can shoot off a conversation to a friend in Alabama. 

And I appreciate that it is sometimes a non-forceful way to contact someone.  Less awkwardness somehow. 

So, though I swore I'd never do it...  I do.  And I'm grateful I can!

What are you grateful for today?

My Husband's Silliness

True, sometimes it drives me absolutely crazy.  Like tonight.

But secretly?  Secretly I love it. 

Because I can be in the worst mood and he starts acting silly and pestering me to the point of absurdity.  And all I can do is laugh, giggle, and smile.

And poof!  That bad mood is squashed. 

(Even if I'm still pretending it isn't ;)).

And I'm grateful for that.

What are you grateful for today?

Diaper Rash Stuff

Sigh...  6 and a half months, and today we had our first real bout of diaper rash.

And it has broken my heart. 

This is the result of 3 poopie diapers today (the last of which I wasn't anticipating).  I don't know how long it took me to discover her final poopie diaper (since when does the sniff test fail!?!), but it couldn't have been more than 2 hours (but apparently was long enough to cause her some problems) and I feel like a lousy mom.  To hear her cry when I change her diaper, even when I am striving to be as gentle as possible, is horrible.

I'm so grateful to have some options to try to heal her diaper rash quickly...  Ointments and essential oil spray.  And I'm hoping hoping hoping that they do the trick fast.  Because I definitely don't like this!  And neither does she!

What are you grateful for today?

Baby Formula

So I'm one of those people who imagines how things will be and sort of gets disappointed when life doesn't turn out that way. 

And maybe that's why I'm given opportunities to experience just such a thing.  To make me grateful for what I do have... and to realize that, just because it isn't all I imagined and wanted, doesn't mean it's not good.

All my life I had wanted to be a mom.  And, to my recollection, I always imagined I would breast-feed my babies.  I always wanted to.  I know not all women have that desire.  But I did. 

My body, however, wasn't so cooperative. 

I had known in advance that I could have issues with this, because of a hormone imbalance.  When I was first pregnant and having my initial visit with the nurse (who is also a lactation nurse), she saw my hormone imbalance in my medical record and advised me that I may want to take some early measures to try to let my body know I want it to produce milk.  And so I did.  But it didn't work.  I saw many lactation consultants (a total of 4; 3 during our hospital stay) and had a lot of hope.  But my milk never came in. 

Let me just say that that was one of the hardest things I had to come to terms with:  my body had failed me, as far as I was concerned.  And even worse, it had failed my precious baby who depended on me for life.  It was a hard time, what with all the hormones raging.  And the thought that I might be starving my baby was pretty horrific.  Even now, when I remember it, I cringe.  It seriously stabs my heart -- and I learned a valuable lesson about being better prepared (the hospital did not send us home with formula, and we didn't buy any, thinking nursing would be no problem). 

We had a breast pump, and when I finally had to acknowledge that I was never going to be able to supply my baby with the food she needed by myself, I remember looking at that thing and crying.  Crying at the loss of something I had hoped for.  (By this point we were using formula, but trying to build my milk supply in the hopes it would increase enough to sustain life).

And then my sweet husband reminded me of something I'll never forget.  He reminded me to be grateful for the access we have to a way to feed our baby.  He reminded me that, even though it didn't turn out to be the way I had hoped and imagined, we still had food to give her to keep her alive.  And in that moment I felt humbled.  And grateful.

And I am grateful that my body did increase its milk supply enough that she would nurse before each bottle.  I'm grateful that, though it was never a possibility for me to nurse exclusively, I was able to experience that bond with my daughter.  I was able to give her something -- and the lactation nurse called it almost like a dose of medicine I was giving her.  She has since decided (in the last couple weeks) that she is no longer interested in nursing, so I didn't push the issue.  We made it 6 months, and for that, I'm grateful.  But I'm definitely grateful for formula that has kept my little girl healthy and happy.  I'm grateful I live in a time when I have options.

And I'm grateful that I can learn how to let go and be grateful for what I do have.

What are you grateful for today?

Nieces and Nephews

I suppose I'm a little biased, but I think I have the best nieces and nephews ever.  And most of them live nearby. 

Today, while celebrating the one who turned 5, I was able to spend time with almost all of them (except the two currently living in Utah).  What a treat! 

Prior to having my own little munchkin, my siblings and siblings-in-law were kind enough to let me enjoy their babies a lot.  I've taken them for frozen yogurt and ice cream.  I've had them spend the night.  I've danced with them at a "ball" (and for some reason always had to be the prince ;)).  I've made indoor tents with them, tickled them, baby-sat them, dressed them in "gowns" and "capes" (blankets and pillowcases).  I've snuggled them as babies -- and hugged them as not-so-much-babies-anymore.  They've been baking helpers, packing "helpers," and gardening helpers. 

They have added such richness to my life.  I am blessed to call them mine as nieces and nephews.  Blessed to have them nearby.  And grateful to have them in my life.

What are you grateful for today?

Christmas Trees

No flash = blurry picture.  But at least the lights show up.

There's just something about Christmas trees at Christmas.  We went out and cut this tree at my in-laws' house this morning.  It didn't look so huge when we were outdoors and it was in its element...  Turns out we only have 1/2 an inch of room to spare!  And clearly, we still have some decorating to do (I only had 2 strands of lights, and this tree needs more than that...).  But even in its unfinished state, this tree has added some magic to our little home.  I've felt cheerier and oh-so-excited about Christmas. 

And munchkin loved the lights (and wanted so badly to get her hands on them...).

I appreciate the talk I heard at church on Sunday where some of the symbolism of the Christmas tree and how it points us to Christ was shared.  Of course, there is the evergreen aspect.  The idea of eternal life through Him.  But I had never before heard the symbolism of the triangular shape -- symbolic of the Godhead, or the fact that it points upward toward God.  It was nice to add those to my little Christmas thoughts.

I'm grateful for our tree and for the Christmas spirit it has brought into our home as we get ready to celebrate at this time of year.

What are you grateful for today?

The Baby Carrier

I don't know what I would do without the baby carrier!  How grateful I am to have gotten one as a baby gift (because it was definitely an item I was planning to buy!).  It has been indispensable in the airport when we went to Alabama.  And for the last two days it has been worn by both my husband and me at the Nativity event. 

See, we went, not only to enjoy the nativities on display, but also to help out a friend with the poinsettias which were purchased by congregants and placed beautifully around all the displays.  And when you're trying to do a whole lot of stuff, it sure helps to have 2 hands!!  Enter the baby carrier!  And aside from the fact that our sweet little cherub is quite grabby these days -- and likes the color red (and pretty much anything else that is a no-no within arm's reach), we were able to get so much more done while wearing the baby than we ever could have otherwise!  (We just had extra little hands to keep out of the way ;)). 

And then today, while I was there for a few hours this morning, I was toting her around in it again.  And she started falling asleep, even in the out-facing position, so I turned her around and she took a nap.  All while I helped people who were there to pick up poinsettias. 

Not only do I love it...  She does too.  She was a happy baby the entire time.  Several people commented on her mellowness and happiness.  And I have to agree, considering she was strapped to Mom (or Dad) for a total of 7 hours over the last couple of days.

Now if I could just take the time to use it more around the house... I might get more Christmas treats done!

What are you grateful for today?

Nativities

Tonight our little family attended a beautiful nativity display at one of the church buildings in our Stake.  There were over 500 different nativities from all around the world.  I love nativities.  I love seeing the different ones -- and seeing how the different cultures depict the sacred event of our Savior's birth.

How grateful I am for these beautiful works of art that remind me of a wondrous night in Bethlehem where a tiny baby boy was born to save the world.

What are you grateful for today?

The Booger Sucker

So for the past few days, this thing has been my best friend.  And my baby girl's worst enemy.  Especially when she's tired. 

I thought I was getting some good use out of this thing when I would successfully use it to snag an annoying booger hanging out in her nose (why are moms so gross!?!  Haha).  Or the few days she sounded a little congested and I was dreading her having a cold and was so surprised when she had no real issues (maybe those were just allergies or change of season sniffles?).  Anyway, I'd break out this bad boy and suction her nostrils.  And I thought I was doing some good. 

I had no idea how powerful this sucker (no pun intended ;)) could be with a completely nasty icky cold!  Let's just (sarcastically) say the last two days have been particularly pleasant -- and this thing has been put to good use! 

I'm hoping that's a sign that this is almost over!

And yeah, I guess it's kind of a gross thing.  But how did women do this back in the days before these things existed?  For one thing, it helps me keep the kiddo's nose from being all snot-covered (well, at least most of the time...).  For another -- I can't imagine how miserable she'd be if I couldn't help her a little bit by using this thing!  Not that I'm suggesting she's a huge fan of it anyway.  She hates it.  But I believe it's helping her a little bit, at least. 

Anyway, I'm grateful I have it, that's for sure.  I can't imagine going through a cold with a baby without it! 

I don't think I'm quite on board with the battery-powered ones that collect all the snot in a little container that's attached, though.  I mean -- it's cool.  And I bet it works wonderfully.  But it kind of grosses me out.

Nonetheless, I'm thankful for booger suckers and whoever invented them!

What are you grateful for today?

Tawni B

Yeah, that's not really Tawni.  (What it is is delicious).

But she surprised me with those today, because she felt bad for me being home with a sick baby.  And that's only one of the ways that Tawni totally rocks.  She also dropped off two huge bins of little girl clothes, and can I say I am still doing the happy dance about that?  Seriously.  I love hand-me-downs.  (And yes, I'm still doing the happy dance about those cookies too.  I just ate two of them.  And would eat the whole box if my husband didn't know about them ;)).

So here's the thing:  there's just something about Tawni.  She has a personality that draws people to her -- and everyone wants to be her friend. 

Maybe it's her kindness and how she is so thoughtful.  The cookies from today are one example.  But I have a lemon tree she brought to our house after we lost our first baby.  She teared up as she told us that it was to represent making lemonade out of the lemons of life.  She may never fully know how much that touched me.  Because that lemon tree is more than just a plant to me.  In a way I can't explain, it makes that pregnancy real and tangible, even though we lost the baby.

Maybe it's the way she is such a great listener.  She and I were pregnant at the same time, and we would walk together some mornings, later in our pregnancies.  She'll probably say she felt like she talked a lot, but seriously...  I'm pretty sure I was the conversation hog.  I've been known to get up on my soapbox a time or two.  But she always listened.  And after we had our babies, I often would go to her house and sit and visit and we'd talk and share the difficulties of mommyhood.  And again, I'm sure I did more talking than she did.  But she listened.  And she was compassionate and empathetic. 

Maybe it's the way she puts people at ease.  I've had people describe her that way to me, and I can see why.  She is open and friendly.  She is genuinely interested in what you have to say.  She just welcomes people with a warm smile and with her sincerity.  And people feel comfortable.  She is not judgmental, and I don't think I've ever heard her say a negative thing about anyone.  She makes efforts to make sure everyone feels included.  She is a great example to me.

Maybe it's because she is so willing to help with whatever you have going.  She helped me throw a baby shower while we were both in our 3rd trimester of pregnancy.  She was asking what she could do to help me with my sick kiddo when she has 3 littlies of her own.  And I know she's headed up several baby showers -- just to make sure the woman didn't get forgotten and left without a baby shower.

She's organized and crafty and creative too.  And selfless.  And beautiful, inside and out.

Tawni is someone I really admire.  And I want to be the kind of friend she is.  The kind of person she is.

I consider it a huge blessing to know Tawni.  I'm grateful she moved into our Ward a few years back.  Grateful that she was called to serve in Primary with our presidency (she totally rocks as the secretary, by the way...).  And while I'm still completely bummed that she is now in another Ward, I'm really grateful she's still nearby and that we hang out from time to time.  And I know she's just spreading more of her joy and love to more people -- and that they, too, are being blessed by knowing her.

What are you grateful for today?

Healthiness

Yep, baby girl has a full on cold.  And it has interrupted her sleeping at night.  And made her more clingy and fussy in the day-time.  And I feel so badly for her, because I know she doesn't understand what's going on and why she can't breathe through her nose.  

And so I'm grateful for the fact that we are generally healthy.  That these little bumps in the road are short-lived.  And that she will be able to be her normal, happy, cold-free self in a few days.  I know she is grateful for that too, even if she doesn't really know it yet ;).

What are you grateful for today?

Christmas Traditions

My day started at 4:30 this morning with a baby girl who was so congested she couldn't suck her thumb and go back to sleep.  Unless she was sleeping on mommy.  Who was sitting in the glider.  And not getting much sleep. 

And though I really loved the baby snuggles, the lack of sleep was hard (I went to bed around midnight).  And as so the day was kind of a grumpy one.  Until only a few minutes ago.

See, my mother-in-law made a sort of advent calendar type thing for all her boys and their families (she made them in 2004).  But it's a book.  And each day has a scripture to read, a Christmas song to sing, and a Christmas story to read.  This is the 3rd year my husband and I have done this tradition (the first being the Christmas we were dating).  And today's story just happened to be one of my favorites in the whole book (Christmas Day in the Morning by Pearl S. Buck).

And as I sat there listening to my husband read this story, my heart softened from the grumpiness I'd been allowing to fester up until that point. 

I'm grateful our family is keeping this tradition.  I look forward to the years ahead when our children are old enough to participate and enjoy it.  I'm grateful for a mother-in-law who gives some of the most cherished home-made gifts.  And I'm grateful for stories that soften my heart and remind me about what really matters.

What are you grateful for today?

Crock Pot Chicken Taco Soup

Okay, okay...  So I am grateful for food.  A lot.  It's just who I am.

Plus, when my days have flown by and I don't feel like I have the time to dedicate to the grateful I've really wanted to do for a couple of days, I pick something I can expound on quickly.  And, quite often, that's food. 

Honestly, I am grateful for food.  I'm grateful we don't have to exist on gruel.  That there is variety.  But that's probably a whole different 'grateful' post, in my opinion. 

So here's why I love (and am grateful for) this chicken taco soup. 

1.  I can eat it every day for a week and not be completely sick of it.  While this is no longer of major concern for me, it was once a huge deal.  When I was in Tuscaloosa going to graduate school, I had a goal to not take on any additional debt.  Therefore, I spent only what I could afford from my working paycheck.  Which had to cover tuition, rent, groceries, gas, electricity... You get the idea.  I will say this:  miracles abounded in my life during that time.  I saw them.  And I know they were the promised blessings being fulfilled because I chose to pay tithing.  But I digress.  Anyway, I didn't have money to waste.  If I made a meal, I had to eat it.  I couldn't go around throwing away food.  Ergo, I was choosey in what I chose to cook.  I was also living alone.  Which meant either eating a sandwich every night (ummm... no thanks) or finding a recipe I could tolerate for several days.  (I have since learned the art of freezing, but at that time, I was naïve).  And let's just say I hit pay-dirt with this recipe.  And it remains one of my favorites.  Of course, these days, most food around here doesn't last for a week (sometimes only a couple days) since I have a husband with a  hearty appetite.  And I'm pretty okay with that :).

2.  It's so stinkin' easy.  Crock pot, check.  A bunch of canned ingredients, check.  Of course, this means it is higher in sodium (a fact I was blissfully ignoring until I married the Mister... who is much more health-conscious than yours truly).  But, now that I have time on my hands (haha... maybe I should say 'now that I'm a stay-at-home-wife-and-mom' -- because I don't think I actually have more time on my hands), I have found ways to reduce the sodium without using reduced-sodium things (which is an option if you choose to buy those).  For example, I've gone to making dried beans.  I don't add salt when I make them and freeze them, so I end up reducing sodium there.  I recently made my first home-made broth (from the Thanksgiving turkey), and though I didn't use it this time (due to the fact that we froze it in 4-cup portions...), I can in the future -- and that would cut out sodium.  This time I also threw in frozen corn instead of canned, so less sodium there.  And I don't use the whole packet of taco seasoning -- I just bought a big container at Costco and use what I deem good enough.  Over the summer, when I had my crop of fresh tomatoes, I'd chopped them up and froze them so I used them in place of the rotel and added a small can of diced green chilies. 

3.  Aside from the sodium (which I'm trying to remedy), it's a relatively healthy meal.  I always choose to use chicken breasts (it's just the way I am... I'm a white meat girl), so that keeps the fat content lower.

4.  Frankly, I'm thankful it was done and I could focus on other things today.  Like baking and shopping and caring for a little munchkin who likes lots of attention :).

So the recipe is here if you'd like it.  I always substitute broth for the beer.

What are you grateful for today?

My Digital Camera

I am a picture taker.

I just love pictures.  I always have.  It drives some of the people in my life crazy...  But that's okay.  I feel like it's a way of documenting life. 

I can remember the days of rolls of film.  I always tried to buy the 36 exposure rolls.  So that I could maximize my picture taking.  And then there was the whole waiting to get them developed ordeal.  And cost.  I can remember how excited I was when we got a 1-Hour Photo option in Panama.  I seriously could not wait to get my pictures!  And it was always a bummer when half of the pictures didn't turn out well.  Because those were moments lost forever.  By the time you realized the picture didn't take well -- or that 5 of the 7 people in the picture blinked...  Well, it was days, weeks, even months later, you know? 

Funny thing is that I swore I wouldn't want -- or get -- a digital camera.  Ever.  (Confession:  I'm a late adopter of technology.)  At that point, I just couldn't grasp the concept of digital pictures and cameras. 

Obviously I got over that.

Now I can't imagine having to wait longer than the flip of the replay button to examine the "goodness" of that last picture ;)...  (And funny enough, kids today know they can see the picture instantly!  And it's never been any other way for them!)

I love my digital camera.  I've had it since 2005, and this thing has been a work-horse!  It's traveled with me from Dothan to Tuscaloosa to Seattle to Panama (where I almost lost it by leaving it in a restaurant in Boquete...) to Atlanta to Bremerton to Birmingham to Orlando to Pennsylvania to New York City to Washington D.C....  And through several of the states as I drove cross-country... twice.  It has captured the Space Needle, the CNN Building, the World of Coke, Bear Bryant (or at least his statue), the Blues Brothers, the Panama Canal, the Panama City Panama Temple, the Liberty Bell.  It has helped me preserve memories of eating an authentic Philly Cheesesteak, riding the NYC subway, surprising my sister with a visit to Washington (before I lived here), visiting friends, having foodie parties, dressing up 80's style, marrying my husband, expanding my stomach in 9 months, my daughter's precious smile -- and even her wonderful laugh!  It has frozen in time images of my mom, my dad, my grandparents, my cousins and aunts and brothers and sisters and nieces and nephews, my friends, my sweetheart, my sweet baby girl, and even me.

My camera is a treasure.  And though it is older and probably outdated by many standards...  It is my camera.  It has experienced so much of my life with me.  It has documented my life and saved for me the images of many years of happiness and joy, hopes and dreams, and even sorrows.  How grateful I am for the technology that exists to allow me to take hundreds... thousands of pictures...  And store them on disks, view them immediately, print them to frame and cherish.  How grateful I am for my little Power Shot.  It's seen so much of what I've seen.  And has much more to see, I'm sure :).

What are you grateful for today?

Christmas Music

It's that time of year again!  And one of my favorite parts of the Christmas season is the Christmas music!!  My memories of Christmas are not complete without memories of the Christmas records (and later CDs) being pulled out and played from the time we set up and decorated our tree until the day after Christmas. 

My mom has some unconventional Christmas music, and I can't say I have followed in her footsteps as far as that goes.  But I still remember them.  Like this one, called "Children Go Where I Send Thee."  But over the years I have found some of my own favorites -- in addition to the traditional ones.  They just add something to Christmas.  Something warm and happy.  Something moving and beautiful.  Something I can't do without. 

I'm grateful for those with musical talents who share and bring the spirit of Christmas more abundantly into my life with music.  I'm grateful for those who share the beautiful messages of a Savior born in Bethlehem.  I'm grateful for the way music can share truth in such a beautiful way.  And I'm grateful to have these wonderful songs to begin our Christmas traditions in our family.  So below are some of my favorites :).

Do They Know it's Christmas -- because my life requires 80s music... all. the time.

Little Drummer Boy/Peace on Earth -- just LOVE this version of the song.  And I love the song in general, so I like most versions of it.  But somehow, Bowie and Crosby hit the spot for me (maybe it's the crush I had on David Bowie when he was the Goblin King?).

Breath of Heaven -- Beautiful.  Just beautiful.  I don't need to say more.

God Bless Your Way -- Another beautiful message.  It brings tears to my eyes every time.  They say you're from heaven...  And that you've been sent here for my sake.  Good luck on your journey and God bless your way.

What are you grateful for today?